Jan 022014

I usually post to the Care-Full Coaching Blog on Wednesday. It’s coming to you on Thursday this week because Wednesday was New Years Day. I figured many of you would be immersed in the Rose Parade, Bowl games, and nursing hangovers (c’mon, you can get a hangover from eating too much or “sugaring out” the night before as well as from other things) to pay much attention to your favorite blogs. But I promise you, this post will give you a perspective that could radically change your life in 2014.

How’s that for a bold statement?

From time to time I sort of fall in love with various TV commercials. After all, sponsors pay advertising agencies obscene sums of money to develop something to capture the short attention span of American audiences for 30 seconds and leave a lasting favorable impression that they hope will cause you to feel good about their products or services. I study commercials to see what works and what doesn’t work in the arena of public persuasion. If commercials are really good they may spawn a series of commercials with consistent characters, scenarios, or locations that evolve and seem to take on a life of their own.

My latest favorite commercial series is from AT&T. A pleasant-looking but otherwise non-descript adult wearing a suit sits at a child-sized school activity table surrounded by three or four four- to six-year-olds. He asks a question and one of the kids pre-empts the others and answers the question in a way that sparks some banter with the adult. The adult delivers humorous repartee with a straight face such that the kid never gets the joke. Meanwhile, I’m all but rolling on the flour laughing. The latest episode of the series features a round-faced boy who talks about his “New Year Revolutions.”

That got me thinking about the whole practice of making resolutions, whether for the New Year or at other times. We “resolve” to do something, usually to eliminate a negative or develop a positive in our lives. We want to solve a problem or solve the mystery that keeps us from something good. The problem is that by the end of the year, only 8% of us who have “resolved” to do or not do something have managed to keep true to our intention. Most of us fail in the first 30 days of the resolution.

Looking at the word “resolve” as the compound word “re-solve” gives us a clue to the high failure rate. When we re-solve we are attempting a solution again. We typically try the same solution we tried before—only this time with more commitment, energy, and discipline. This time we’ll make it happen.

Einstein once observed that insanity was doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different result. But if we think the things we’ve always thought, we’ll get the things we’ve always got. Maybe it’s time to take to heart the malapropism of the boy in the AT&T commercial and have a revolution in our approach rather than a resolution that’s—once again—doomed to failure. Maybe it’s time to take a new approach.

Don’t know what that new approach should be or even how to go about discovering what it should be? That’s what coaches are for. Maybe your revolutionary approach this year is to get a coach to help you discover revolutionary ways to meet your primary presenting problem in 2014.

Here’re some examples of what I mean by “primary presenting problems”:

  • Having goals, skills, or projects you want to attain or achieve but a seeming inability to reach, acquire, or complete them.
  • Feeling stuck and needing an honest, outside perspective on how to get un-stuck.
  • Lacking clarity but realizing there are time-sensitive decisions that must be made in the near future.
  • Needing support in reaching your goals.
  • Feeling pressure to make a big change in a short time and don’t know where to start.
  • Needing someone to help you focus, challenge you, and hold you accountable to your commitments and dreams.
  • Wanting to accelerate results in your life and/or profession
  • Wanting to change jobs or professions but needing help in thinking how to go about it.
  • Feeling that your work and personal life are out of balance and not liking either the feeling or the consequences that come from that lack of balance.
  • Feeling drained by relationships and wanting an energy-giving relationship in your life.

If you identify with any of the above, you could probably benefit from having a coach. The question then must be asked, “Are you coachable?” Here’s a simple test. Ask yourself how much you agree with the following 6 statements.  Completely?  Somewhat? Not at all?

  • I sincerely need and want to change areas of my life for the better.I am not looking for a quick fix.
  • I am not looking for a “one-size-fits-all” road-map to fulfillment.
  • I am open to honest feedback and candid assessments.
  • I am the only one who can make my life better.
  • I view coaching as a worthwhile investment in myself.

If you agreed “Completely” with 4 or more of the statements, you’re probably in a coachable frame of mind.  If you agreed “Not at all” with any of the statements, a coaching relationship would probably be difficult for you at this time.

Then of course the nagging question arises, “How much does a coach cost?” You can click on the “Fees for Services” page on the menu in the right-hand sidebar. Don’t forget, everyone’s eligible for a Free Coaching Discovery Session also.

Wishing you a New Year Revolution in 2014.



 Posted by at 7:50 am